FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Already have the shovel to bury the body of the person that made you cry.
FRIENDS: Will pass you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.
FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so you can collect insurance.
FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and runs.
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.
FRIENDS: Will hide you from the cops.
BEST FRIENDS: Are probably the reason they’re after you in the first place.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the cell with you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.
FRIENDS: Will help me find your way when I'm lost.
BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with your compass, stealing your map and giving you bad directions.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'M HOME
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college.
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say, "Girl drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste!"
FRIENDS: Would read and ignore this.
BEST FRIENDS: Will re-post this crap
Do you live with or know about child abuse? If you do, or don't read the poem below, copy and paste it into your profile, you never know it just might make someone feel better and give them hope.
My name is Sarah.
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long.
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight.
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the hard wall I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.
This is scary but pretty accurate..
1 Which color is better red, black, green, blue, or yellow
2 What's your first initial?
3 What month were u born?
4 Which color do you like more, black or white?
5 Name one of your friends
6 Name a number 1-100
7 Do you like flying or driving more
8 Do you like lakes or oceans more
Think of a wish, but don't write it...1 If you chose
1 If you chose:
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love
Black : You are conservative and aggressive
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love and give good advice to those who are down
Yellow - You are a very happy person with alot to give
2 If you're initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life
L-R: You try to enjoy your life to the maximum & your love life is soon to blossom
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good
3 If you were born in:
Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected
April-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will last forever
July-Sept: You will have a great year and will experience a major life-changing experience for the good
Oct-Dec: Your love life will be great, and eventually you will find your soul mate
4 if you chose:
Black: Your life will take you on a different direction, it will seem hard at times but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do any thing for you, but you may not realize it
5 This person is your best friend
6 If it is 1-50 you are a very lovable person and you have a great life
More than 50, screw the world
7 If you chose: Flying - You like adventure
Driving - You are a laid back person
8 if you chose:
Lake - You are loyal to your friends, your lover, and yourself
You are very reserved but emotional
Ocean - You are spontaneous and like to please people
9 if you want your wish to come true, repost this.
ONLY AWESOME PEOPLE WOULD GET IT:
dear algebra,don't ask me to find your X,she's never comming back.and don't ask Y
dear math,stop trying to ask me to solve your problems,i have problems of my own
Please
Stop
Learning
Everything
'Silence is golden.duct tape is silver'
'Violence won’t solve anything…But it sure makes me feel good'
'Police pulls over a speeding car ;
COP: I’ve been waiting for you all day.
DRIVER: Yeah well I got here as fast as I could'
'Boy: “You’re not my type.”
Girl: “Why, cause I can read??”'
'If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out'
'Teacher: We are going to play the quiet game.
Student: Are you playing too?'
'You: Do you want a piece of my mind?!
Me: Oh no, I couldn’t take the last piece.'
'When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.'
'Attempting to give a damn…
Unable to give a damn…
Stopping…
Process failed!
[Damn not given]'
'Question: Do you know who I am????
Answer: No, Why? Have you forgotten?'
'You: Go to Hell!
Me: See you there.'
'Sales Clerk: Sir are you going to buy that?
Person: No, I’m just shop lifting it all the way to the cash register…'
'You: “Why are you here?”
Me: “Well… Heaven didn’t want me,
And hells afraid I’ll take over.”'
'Me- “What time is it?”
You- “There’s a clock right there.”
Me- “Did I ask you where the clock was!?”'
'Mom: What did you learn in school today sweetheart?
Me: Obviously not enough. I have to go back tomorrow'
'I ain’t sleeping. I am just looking into my eyelids.'
'Cashier: Hi can I help you?
Me: No I just stood in line for 10 minutes to say hi.'
'hate is a special kind of love that you give to the people you do not like'
98% of girl teens would cry their ass off if they saw Justin Beiber get hit by a car. If you are one of the 3% who would say "Finally my ears will stop bleeding" post this on your profile
If you ever wished you could live in a story, copy and paste this to your profile.
If several inanimate objects just seem to hate you (STUPID LOCKER!) copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away and remembered copy this into your profile.
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do so at random moments, copy and paste this in you're profile.
This is a love letter from a boy to a girl... However, the girl's father does not like him and want them stop their relationship...and so..the boy wrote this letter to the girl..he knows that the girl's father will definitely read this letter..
1 "The great love that I have for you
2 is gone, and I find my dislike for you
3 grows every day. When I see you,
4 I do not even like your face;
5 the one thing that I want to do is to
6 look at other girls. I never wanted to
7 marry you. Our last conversation
8 was very boring and has not
9 made me look forward to seeing you again.
10 You think only of yourself.
11 If we were married, I know that I would find
12 life very difficult, and I would have no
13 pleasure in living with you. I have a heart
14 to give, but it is not something that
15 I want to give to you. No one is more
16 foolish and selfish than you, and you are not
17 able to care for me and help me.
18 I sincerely want you to understand that
19 I speak the truth. You will do me a favor
20 if you think this is the end. Do not try
21 to answer this. Your letters are full of
22 things that do not interest me. You have no
23 true love for me. Good-bye! Believe me,
24 I do not care for you. Please do not think that
25 I am still your boyfriend."
So bad!! However, before handing over the letter to the girl, the boy told the girl to "READ BETWEEN THE LINES", meaning-only to read 1. 3. 5. 7. 9. 11. 13. 15. 17. 19. 21. 23. 25. (Odd Numbers) So..Please try reading it again!
It's so smart & sweet...
If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else (a lot), copy this into your profile
Man:where have you been all my life?
woman:hiding from you
Man :haven't i seen you somewhere before?
woman:yes that's why i don't go there anymore
Man :is this seat empty?
woman:yes and this one will be to if you sit down
Man :your place or mine?
woman:both you go to yours and i'll go to mine
Man:so what do you do for a living?
woman :i'm a female impersonater
Man :hey baby whats your sign?
woman:do not enter
Man:how do you like your eggs in the morning?
woman:unfertalized
Man:your body is a temple
woman :sorry there are no services today
Man:i would go to the end of the world for you
woman:but would you stay their?
Man:if i could see you naked i'd die happy
woman:if i saw you naked i'd probably die laughing (lol)
Man:if i could rearange the alphabet i'd put u and i together
woman:really i'd rut f and u together
man:your eyes there amazing
woman:seeing your back would be pretty amazing
Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school He told his friends that it was cool And when he pulled the trigger back It shot with a great crack Mummy I was a good girl I did what I was told I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another And all because he got the gun from his older brother Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush And tell my little sister that she is the only one now And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class And never to forget this and please don't let this pass Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack Mummy listen to me if you would I wanted to go to college I wanted to try things that were new I guess I'm not going with daddy On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married I wanted to have a kid I wanted to be an actress Mummy I wanted to live But mummy I must go now The time is getting late Mummy tell my Chris I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date I love you mummy I always have I know you know it's true Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you" In memory of the Columbian students that were lost Please if you would Pass this around I'd be happy if you could Don't smash this on the ground If you pass this on Maybe people will cry Just keep this in heart For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye" Now you have two choices 1) repost and show you care 2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart (Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care.)
Guy's point of view:
This is very cute! And even written by a guy!
You might agree with it, but when it actually happens 99 of girls don't realize it 'til it is too late and that guy who did it is so frustrated that he has moved on to someone who will take notice.
From a guys point of view:
We don't care if you talk to other guys.
We don't care if you're friends with other guys.
But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off.
It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.
We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned.
Nothing is that important at 2 a.m. that it can't wait till he morning.
Also, when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/ stunning, we freaking mean it.
Don't tell us we're wrong.We'll stop trying to convince you.
The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
Yeah, you can quote me.
Don't be mad when we hold the door open.
Take Advantage of the mood im in.
LET US PAY FOR YOU! DON'T 'FEEL BAD'
We enjoy doing it.
It's expected.
Smile and say 'thank you.'
Kiss us when no one's watching.
If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.
You don't have to get dressed up for us.
If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of makeup you own.
We like you for WHO you are and not WHAT you are.
Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up.
Don't take everything we say seriously.
Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.
Don't get angry easily.
Stop using magazines/media as your bible.
Don't talk about how hott Morris Chesnutt, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is in front of us. It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for that.
Whatever happened to the word 'handsome'/'beautiful'.
I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with 'Hey handsome!' instead of 'Hey baby/ stud/ cutie/ sexy' or whatever else you can think of.
On the other hand im not sayin i wouldn't like it ether.
Girls: I cannot stress this enough: IF YOU AREN'T BEING TREATED RIGHT BY A GUY, DON'T WAIT FOR HIM TO CHANGE. DITCH HIS SORRY DISGRACE-TO-THE-MALE-POPULATION , AND FIND SOMEONE WHO WILL TREAT YOU WITH UTTER RESPECT
Someone who will honor your morals.
Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.
Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.
Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.
Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes...and say 'i love you' ...AND ACTUALLY MEAN IT!
Give the nice guys a chance
Holdin Hands:
Girls : If you want to hold his hand, gently bump into it a couple of times. Guys : Grab it if it happens more than once.
Cuddling:
Girls : When you want to cuddle with him, tell him you're cold. Guys : Automatically move closer to her.
Movies:
Girls : During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your head on his shoulder Guys : Lift her chin up and kiss her.
Loving each other:
Guys : When she tells you she loves you, look deep into her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too... and mean it.
Laying below the stars:
Girls : When you're both laying under the stars, put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady heart beat Guys : Whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers. Now make a wish about something you would like to happen Between you and your crush...
Guys: NO grabbing!
Stop!! Stop!!
Stop!! Stop!!
If you havent stoped.
Seriously stop!
Guys repost this if you agree.
Girls repost this if you think it's cute.
Every Guy who isn't a jerk will agree with this, so we hope that all the girls that read this will post this.
Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.
Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot;
who calls you back when you hang up on him;
who'll lay under the stars for hours and just listen to your heart beat,
or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy that kisses your forhead;
who keeps your picture in his wallet;
who wants to show you off to the world even when you're in sweatpants;
who holds your hand in front of all his friends;
who thinks you're beautiful without make-up;
one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you...
the one who turns to his friends and says THAT'S HER!
7 REASONS NOT TO MESS WITH SMALL CHILDREN!!!
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face." "Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE . God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:
When she walks away from you, mad:
Follow her
When she stares at your mouth:
Kiss her
When she pushes you or hits you:
Grab her and don't let qo
When she starts cussinq at you:
Kiss her, and tell her you love her
When she's quiet:
Ask her what’s wronq
When she iqnores you:
Give her your attention
When she pulls away:
Pull her back
When you see her at her worst:
Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start cryinq:
Just hold her, and don't say a word
When you see her walkinq:
Sneak up behind her, and huq her waist
When she's scared:
Protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder:
Tilt her head up, and kiss her
When she steals your favorite hat:
Let her keep it, and sleep with it for a niqht
When she teases you:
Tease her back, and make her lauqh
When she doesn't answer for a lonq time:
Reassure her that everythinq is okay
When she looks at you with doubt:
Back yourself up
When she says that she likes you:
She really does, more than you could ever understand
When she qrabs at your hands:
Hold hers and play with her finqers
When she bumps into you:
bump into her, too, and make her lauqh
When she tells you a secret:
keep it safe, and untold
When she looks you in your eyes:
don't look away, until she does
When she misses you:
she's hurtinq inside
When you break her heart:
the pain never really qoes away
When she says it’s over:
she still wants you to be hers
When she reposts this bulletin:
she wants you to read it!
When she’s not sayinq anythinq on the phone:
Don’t hanq up
When she says she's ok:
Don't believe it, talk with her
On her birthday:
Call her at 12 am and tell her you love her.
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
Tease her:
Let her tease you back.
When she’s sick:
Stay up all niqht with her
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it’s stupid.
Give her the world.
Let her wear your clothes.
When she's bored and sad:
hanq out with her.
Let her know she's important.
Kiss her in the pourinq rain.
When she runs up to you cryinq, the first thinq you say is:
"Who's butt am I kickinq?"
If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.
Text you.