I don't use this site too much anymore, but I do still stop by. Not sure if or when I'll upload anything further, but feel free to send a message, and I'll probably see it sooner or later.
Obviously, I don't own the works that the stories I write on this site are based on, or intend to make money off of them, and my producing them is entirely out of my love for those original works as a fan. Fanfiction falls under nonprofit transformative/derivative work, a tradition as old as storytelling.
Status of my stories
It updates when it updates. I am a capricious master. I do what I want. Will I ever finish a story that isn't a one-shot or Break Through the Limit? Eh, who can say.
I was once given an award for best/worst martial arts moves. In an IT class.
QUOTES (more will be added periodically):
"...I'm a buffoon." --LucifVegeta
"thanks, global warming or the Illuminati or whatever" --Captain Space
"Becoming the best breakdancing tuna fish known in the universe." --Ultimate Black Ace
"The Monty Python fish-slapping dance seemed relevant.
I never thought I'd be able to legitimately say that." --Captain Space
"Star Wars X Wizard of Oz my OTP" --Kaise
"You apply bombs far too liberally to every situation."
"I appear to be whipping a small child to death."
"He's French. He's an idiot."
"Gandalf, in the coffee-shops of Narnia?"
"I think we'd be better off with Batman and Hitler."
"Aww, I have to stop killing rabbits!"
"Bombs are not the solution to every problem, only most of them."
"Are you all right?"/"Yeah, I'm just a heroin addict."
"Please stop shooting me, it's very annoying."
"You and your arthritis are distracting me."
"No, no, but yes. No but yes, I mean, no as in no, but yes as in yes! No, no as in yes!"
"I don't need elevators! I have guns!"
"Monasteries can be built in different directions."/"Not my monasteries, sir!"
"No, [name] , that's not how you play with humans, that's weird!"
"...I did not eat that biscuit nearly as competently as I thought."
Me (helping sister with revision): "Question 2!" Sister: "NO!" Me: "YES!" Sister: "...okay."
"I love you."/"I WANT BURGERS!"
(angrily) "Spoons! Multiple spoons!"
"I want to learn how to use guns and knives. No reason. Just because."
"The pig represents the goat."/"How does a pig represent a goat?"/"Because we don't have a goat!"
"Your face is a random Christmas tree on the edge of a lake."
"The circle of life is not in front of Walmart."
"Hey, you don't speak for Dracula."
"This...is not the Game of Life. This is several tubs of playdough."/"It's a metaphor!"
"I'm a drunk goose who loves to party!"
High School (names have been removed to protect the innocent, and the guilty too because I'm just nice like that):
"I wouldn't be surprised if there were crisps in my shoes."
"It's...like a really naff council of evil!" (speaker was referring to me and my friends...)
"Owls hang upside-down, like bats. They're like elephants."
"Okay, I can understand the biting..."
"I am my own father."
"Which is better than Welsh people, to be fair."
"It'd be a great way to kidnap kids."
"He's like a plastic elf."
"Oink oink, mother#*@!er."
"I'm in sausage roll troubles."
"See, I have a good segregation system going on."
"Nobody kills a giraffe, it's the king of the jungle."
"He's done so much heroin he's become imaginary."
"Why aren't your flamingoes?"
"French people are the worst."
"I forgot I had two hands."
"I feel like I'm a toddler having dinner."
"If there was a famine, I would live and you would die."
"Why would anyone want to be a biscuit?!"
"It does smell good. Sniff the book!"
"[name] looks like diced fish."
"You look like Jesus from here."
"I'd forgotten I was Chinese."
"Look, 'normal' is relative. Nobody's 'normal'." /"I'm normal!"/[uproarious laughter]
"I can't find it, I've stuck a periodic table over it."