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LaurenIvashkov PM
Biography
Joined Dec '12

I really really love to read. Obviously or I wouldn't be here with this account trying to come up with shitty stories (sorry bout the language). Notice how I said try...? Yea. I failed.

Do it one by one, don't look ahead!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

None

2.Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, or yellow?

Blue

3. Your first initial?

L

4. Your month of birth?

July

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

Black

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

Tori

7. Your favorite number?

Don't have one.

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

I've never been to California but I would love to go.

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

Ocean

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Having a social life.

Are you done?

If so scroll down

(don't cheat- -)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person

2. If you choose

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and agressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is is soon to blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relashonship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experiance a major life changing experiance for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soulmate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on in a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides with you and would do anything for you, but may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. THis is how many close friends you will have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose

California: You like adventure.

Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...

Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come before your next birthday!

Guys here's some advice from a girl.

When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind.

When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around.

When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all.

When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.

When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever.

When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered.

When a girl says "I love you." she means it.

When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that.

Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person.

If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you

Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you.

Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere.

So get ready for the biggest shock of your life.

Man: “Haven't we met before?" Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
Man: “Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Man: “Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: “So, wanna go back to my place?" Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?”
Man: "Your place or mine?" Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?" Woman: "It's in the phone book." Man: "But I don't know your name." Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
Man: "So what do you do for a living?" Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do Not Enter"
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" Woman: "Unfertilized!"
Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason" Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
Man: "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy." Woman: "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?"
Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.”
Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "I'd go through anything for you. Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you." Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"

10 Commandments of a Teenager

1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping. (why wait that long)

2) Thou shall not do drugs. (alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)

3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart. (Walmart has a bigger selection)

4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism. (destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)

5) Thou shall not steal from your parents. (everyone knows grandma has more money)

6) Thou shall not get into fights. (Cat fight anyhow...just start them.)

7) Thou shall not skip class. (just take the whole day off)

8) Thou shall not strip in class. (Hooters pays more)

9) Thou shall not think about having sex. (like Nike says, "just do it”)

10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street. (just leave 'em in the middle)

The Six Truths of Life:

1. You can't lick all of your teeth with your tongue.

2. You just tried to do the above.

3. The first truth is a lie.

4. You're smiling now because you're realizing you're an idiot.

5. You'll copy this into your profile for some other sucker to read it.

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