This is this cat.
This is is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is a cat.
This is dumbass cat.
This is busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is twenty cat.
This is seconds cat.
Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I betcha you can't resist passing it on!
Female come backs pick up line comebacks Female Comebacks
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together
Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.
Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"
Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Woman: Did it hurt when you were dropped on your head repeatedly as a baby?
Man: Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here!
Woman: Really? I have the incredible urge to plant my foot up your @.
If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost this... If you don't resend this then your love life will be doomed for eternity.
GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks"
GUYS REPOST THIS AS "don't let this happen
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turnPURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism!!
Month One
Mommy, I am only 8 inches long but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.
Month Two
Mommy today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.
Month Three
You know what Mommy I'm a boy! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.
Month Four
Mommy my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.
Month Five
You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?
Month Six
I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!
Month Seven
Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy?
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two more legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak.
If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried post this in your profile
At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
it all over his lap.
When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
by never even bothering to practice.
When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by
jumping out of the car and never looking back.
When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.
When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.
When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion.
You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.
When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.
When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.
When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
thanked him by taking it every chance you could.
When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
by being on the phone all night.
When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
him by staying out partying until dawn.
When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.
When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
how deeply he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the
country.
When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You
thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their
children.
And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, post this on your profile
If you've ever misspelled your own name, paste this on your profile.
If you've ever had to ask your best friend your OWN Phone/Cell Number to tell another Friend paste this in your profile.
If you have ever pushed a door that said pull or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If YOU get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever walked around out anywhere and started talking to yourself thus receiving strange looks from people paste this in your profile.
eliforp ruoy otno siht etsap dna ypoc siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fi
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile. (If you don't know what this means, you've obviously never done it)
If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.
You Might Be An Author If...
1. Every time you hear a song, you think of a new story or one you've already written.
2. You have the last chapters of a story done before even thinking of the characters names.
3. You often imagine your books becoming movies.
4. Spell check is your best friend.
5. You give even the smallest of characters a huge background.
6. You hesitate before killing of one of your favourite characters.
7. You smile really big when your gonna finally write a character love scene.
8. Every time you read something, you make your own story of the same thing.
9. You'll spend an hour trying to find one word cause you won't dare use a synonym.
10. Not being able to write is like not being able to pee to you... you just can't hold it in for so long.
11. You write so fast, you leave out words in a sentence.
12. You have to tell at least one person your whole story before it's even written.
13. Things that are written badly annoy you and make you want to re-write it better.
14. You laugh at jokes you wrote yourself.
15. You can spell words like 'troublesome' but can't spell 'the' half the time.
16. If you're note writing or typing, your fingers are moving constantly.
17. You talk to yourself... constantly.
18. You forget what day it is when your writing.
19. When you have to write some sort of story in class, you get carried away.
20. You would rather die than use words like 'good' or 'nice' and etc.
21. You put off the last chapter of a story simply because you don't want it to end.
22. You start to cry when writing about a death or other depressing event you knew was coming, and you are the one writing it.
23. When on a roll, you will ignore hunger, sleepiness, or the urge to pee until you run out of ideas.
24. If a story, movie, show, etc. finishes without closure, you have a powerful need to write a suitable ending.
25. You like to fidget, tap, or chew on the tip of something when you are trying to come up with a new sentence, paragraph, chapter, or story.
26. You are in love with the Thesaurus.
27. You dream about your stories.
28. You dream of new stories.
29. You often revisit some of your old stories.
30. Someone can call your name twenty times without you hearing if you're writing.
31. You have more than one story going at a time.-brought to my attention by Aodghan. It's very true.
Copy and Paste this if you're a writer.
Star Signs
AQUARIUS- The Sweetheart (Jan 20-Feb 18) Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but can be original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality.
PISCES- The Dreamer (Feb 19-Mar 20) Generous, kind and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative. May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Doesn't like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful.
ARIES- The Daredevil (Mar 21- Apr 19) Energetic. adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse (easily angered). Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic.
TAURUS- The Enduring One (Apr 20-May 20) Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings who are stable and secure in their own way. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to furious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous.
GEMINI- The Chatterbox (May 21-June 20) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. adaptable but needs to express themselves. Arguementive and outspoken. Likes change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips. May seem superficial and inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally.
CANCER- The Protector (June 21-July 22) Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from everyone. Easily hurt, but sympathetic.
LEO- The Boss (July 23-Aug 22) Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Likes to help others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to the Leo's. Attractive.
VIRGO- The Perfectionist Dominant (Aug 23-Sept 22) In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Arguementive. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hard working. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.
LIBRA- The Harmonizer (Sept 23-Oct 22) Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.
SCORPIO- The Intense One (Oct 23-Nov 21) Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hard working. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and emotional.
SAGITTARIUS- The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22-Dec 21) Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up. Indulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out.
CAPRICORN- The Go-Getter (Dec 22-Jan19) Patient and wise. practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competitions. Get what they want.
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murderer chanted," Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiilling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.
shivvers
This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?
Repost this if you truly believe in God.
PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what,
and if you stand up for him he will stand up for you.
What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:
When she walks away from you mad
Follow her
When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her
When she pushes you or hits you
Grab her and don't let go
When she starts cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong
When she ignores you
Give her your attention
When she pulls away
Pull her back
When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared
Protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steals your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up
When she says that she likes you
she really does more than you could understand
When she grabs at your hands
Hold hers and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you
bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret
keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes
don't look away until she does
When she misses you
she's hurting inside
When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away
When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers
When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it -
Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.-
When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember-
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-
Tease her and let her tease you back.-
Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-
Give her the world.-
Let her wear your clothes.-
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-
Let her know she's important.-
Kiss her in the pouring rain.-
When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's butt am I kicking?"
If you are an Itachi fangirl and just cannot hold it in copy this on your profile.
If you hate Karin from Naruto and want to see her get stabbed by evil spork wielding gnomes copy and paste this into your profile!
If you ever walked into the wrong classroom, copy and paste this into your profile.
98 of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.
If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you don't believe life is fair shit...copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're a girl and get sick and tired of guys assuming that you're weak and can’t fight, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completely has to have the nickname "Chicken Butt Hair Dude" copy and paste this into your profile while laughing your head off!
lol if u have ever dun anything stupid in your life copy and paste this into your profile
if u like this face O.o or this one O.O copy and paste this into your profile
if your friends are idiots and keep u relativlea sane copy and paste this into your profile
if u tend to lagh your ass off at funny ffs and your friends think your wird copy and paste this into your profile
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai, Vert9411, pinkcherryblossom225CherryBlossoms016,Sam-AKA-SakuxSasuLover-,pinkcherryblossoms225,crimsonchidori,SasukeSakuraxXXxItachiSakura, iluvdraco4life, SayonaraKuroi
If you have trouble making decisions, either copy and paste this into your profile or look up the word "floccinaucinihilipifilification" in the
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile
If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.
If you hate girly-girls or people who think that they are everything, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile:D
If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore.
Put this in your profile if you are one of the 8 who would be laughing their asses off
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you don't understand why Britney Spears is suddenly “in” again, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia
If you would like to join the awesome religion which is Inuyashism, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list! purduepup, nightfalcon222, Daichilover, xbeautyxxisxxlifex, GoldenRose88, AnimeRomanceFreak1990, Rangurren, kanna37, yasha012, and SayonaraKuroi!
100 Stupid Things People Always Do! (Bold Those You've Done)
- Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or football with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock (OCD Problems)
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. Walked into a pole
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair,
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side.
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it.
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't (not drunk, but like off a Sharpie kinda thing?)
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men's dress shirts have a loop on the back
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone.
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at someone/something
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it.
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a 'beware of dog' sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class
100. Have popped a balloon in your mouthThis is cool! Try and read it!
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling
was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!If you could read that put it in your profile.
In Remembrance...
…In Remembrance to Severus Snape….
….A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor…
...without all the red and gold crap.
…In Remembrance to Fred Weasley…
…Who fought bravely to the very end….
…And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half…
…And will loyally await his soul mate and brother…
… with many jokes…
...he's got forever to think of them, right?
…In Remembrance to Dobby…
…Who was more free and full of love…
...than any elf, and most humans.
….In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin….
...the last real Marauder...
…who was not just a wonderful father…
….a incredible husband and brave hero…
...as well as a freakin' awesome werewolf.
….In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks…
…who died for ‘the greater good’…
...and would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora.
…In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody….
…who’s motto ‘constant vigilance’ kept him alive…
...and scared the crap out of some kids too.
…In Remembrance of Tom Marvolo Riddle a.k.a. Voldemort….
…who was pretty cool, and cute when he was younger…
…but who got his ass thoroughly kicked in the end
…In Remembrance of Albus Dumbledore…
…whose past and wisdom confused us…
…whose seeming betrayal shocked us…
…but actually who turned out to be an okay guy in the end...
...despite the whole 'almost killing Harry' thing.
...In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange…
… because it’s was awesome how Molly slapped her with that Avada Kedavra!
...She deserved everything she got and more.
…In Remembrance of Colin Creevey…
…who we really didn’t know too well…
…but took a lot of pictures and died fighting in a war…
…so he must’ve done something good…
…besides stalking Harry.
…In Remembrance of Hedwig…
...Harry actual first friend…
...who lived and died soaring.
'Those who say nothing is impossible have never tried to slam a revolving door.'
"It is home-made...Just not in my home." - my friend
'It's not paranoia if you know they are out to get you.'
'Whilst being eternally positive may not get you anywhere in life, the people it annoys along the way will make it worth it' - referenced in a story I read...can't remember which (shrugs sheepishly)
"I would rather be near to the birds then waste my life wishing I had wings." - quote from a patient in 'House MD' the TV show
"Forget I know where you live. I know where you sleep." - Me to my brother, as telling him I know where he lives is rather redundant and completely ineffective.
"I never trust something that bleeds 4-5 days of every month and doesn't die."
"I never argue with an idiot, they drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience."
"If 'poli' means 'many', and tics are bloodsucking parasites, what does that make politics?"
'Not a snowballs chance in hell.' - don't know who but this is one of my favourite quotes
"Before you judge someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, once you've judged them, you're a mile away and have their shoes."
"If explosives didn't solve your problems you obviously weren't using enough of them." - in the story 'Reloaded' chapter 9
"Note to Self: NAZIS do not appreciate dumb-blonde jokes." - made this up myself for a story I'll probably never get around to writing :P
'The only difference between genius and stupidity, is that genius has limits.'
Ninety-five percent of kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley bored, Gem W, Bara- Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Carzy Billie Joe loving freak, shadow929, The Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/ fairy to be, The Gypsy- Pirate Queen, MCR Rocks, Andrew Laplante, MajorDxSFanatic,teh queen of randomness,Xannijn, powderedsugar, Black Wolf-Dog, Fluff's Lady, night flame miko, SayonaraKuroi
92 percent American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others.
7 Ways to scare your roommates
7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon..."
6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.
5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.
4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.
3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you’re hungry.
2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"
1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."
40 Things to do when your in Walmart! - UPDATED!!-
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15.Grab alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go"
16. Pass out bananas to random people and snicker loudly when they take one.
17. Buy 350 cans of tuna and scream "THIS CAN'T BE RIGHT!! YOU HAVE TO PUT SOME BACK!!" when the cashier tells you the price.
18. Walk around looking confused in the CD section and ask people where you can find the CDs.
19. Start a fish-stick fight.
20. Walk up to random people, give them bear hugs, and say very loudly that you missed them and they never really did get that dandruf shampoo you recommended.
21. Jump in a cart and have a friend push you while you scream "The Germans are coming!"
22. Attempt to fly off a high shelf.
23. Run up to an employee and ask "Do you like me?" If they say no, yell out "You broke my heart, you evil monster! I'm telling the manager!" and start throwing canned tomatoes at them. If they say yes just to get you away, pat their shoulder, and say "What a shame because that girl over there" point to a random person "was just about to ask you to dinner."
24. Throw confetti on random people walking into the store.
25. Whisper "I know your 'little' secret" to people in the checkout lines.
26. Stand inside the freezer in the frozen food section.
27. Walk up to employees and whisper "I saw dead people...they want me to take you away...to aisle eight..."
28. Ask the clerk to make a page saying "If there is an Edward in the store, Bella is looking for you at the main info desk". (this works b/c of fangirls...no offense)
29. See how many cans of frosting you can open and thoroughly lick without getting caught.
30. Go to a person with a shopping cart full of merchandise and demand a ride in the basket.
31. Practice your juggling with a few Grade-A eggs.
32. Squeeze the cream-filled doughnuts.
33. Walk into the baby clothes section, pick up a pink baby dress, then throw it down and run away screaming that the pink bunnies of doom came back.
34. Bow to the display of T.Vs in the electronics section.
35. See if you can move the bottom can from the gigantic canned beet pyrami
36. Challenge people to duels in the back aisles with wrapping paper tubes.
37. Have a conversation with yourself loud enough so that people in the other aisles can hear you.
38. Throw things over one aisle into another one.
39. Mark out price tags with a sharpie
40. Hit some random Asain dude in the ass with a Yaoi paddle.
Bad Things to Hear on an Airplane Intercom
1. This is your captain speaking and I don't feel that life is worth living anymore
2. We're cruising at an altitude of... Ah hell I don't know
3. Could somebody come up here and tell me what this button does?
4. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! Just kidding.
5. Would the fight attendant bring me a martini? And keep 'em comin'
6. This is... uh... This is... uh... your... Hmm, I seem to have lost my memory...
7. Passengers on the left side of the plane -- does that engine sound funny to you?
8. Good God Steve! We’re going to crash! Oops -- is this intercom on?
9. We'll be on the ground in ten minutes. One way or another...
10. This is your captain speaking: I'm depressed, suicidal, and I'm taking you all with me. By the way, I've already killed the co-captain.
11. Dammit, Steve! You're the father of my baby! You know what? I'm-- AAAAHHH!! OH GOD, I'M HAVING THE BABY!! DAMN YOU, STEVE!! IF I'M GONNA HAVE THIS BABY NOW, YOU'RE GONNA FEEL THIS PAIN WITH ME!! Oh shit... is the intercom actually on?
12. This is your captain spreaking: we're about to land, but... uh... does anybody know how? I was kinda weak on that in piloting school...
-If a stranger offers you a ride, only go with him if he has candy.
-BRB, I'm busy trying to jump off the roof with the kitchen broom.
-Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS
Be nice to losers. one day they might be cool!
- There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
- Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
- I'm not crazy- I'm psychotic . . . There's a difference!
- There's nothing that can't be fixed with: duct tape, chocolate, or by running it over.
- My attention span is just short enough to annoy you and ignore you all at the same time.
- Dream as if you’ll live forever… Live as if you die today
- Don't get mad; get sadistic.
Dont worry, we'll get threw this with inexpensive therapy, bubble wrap, and chocolate.
- Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Common sense is the enemy of comedy.
- Sarcasm isn't an attitude, it's an ART.
- My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog thinks I am.
- Knowledge is power; power is the root of all-evil. Therefore studying is evil.
- I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it!
- You know what?! Earth sucks, I’m going home.
- Only two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity.
- If you laugh I will laugh. If you cry I will cry and if you jump out a window...I will laugh.
- your a great friend but if the zombies come I'm tripping you.
- Why don't you slip into something more comfortable; like a coma?
- What is this 'kindness' you speak of?
- Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever, you keep on talking.
- Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?
- You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
- Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.
- The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
- He who laughs last didn't get it.
- When there's a will, I want to be in it.
-Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
-The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.
- When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
- Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
Being weird is like being normal, only better!!
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me!!
Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.
Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall downstairs
Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.
One day, will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject
When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.
It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather...not screaming like the passengers in his car.'
' I am not crazy! U know what! The voices don't like u anymore!'
Death is life’s way of saying you’ve been fired.
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is to stubborn to ask directions.
It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.
I hate it when the voices and my imaginary friends fight.
The trouble with life is there's no background music
Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
Stupid kills, unfortunately not fast enough.
They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?
' The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality.'
My night in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
God made man, knew he could do better, and made woman.
At my lemonade stand I used to give away the first glass for free, and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote.
I was about to conquer the world but then I got distracted by something shiny
They laugh because we're losers...We laugh because they just figured it out.
Weather Forecast for tonight: darksometimes your knight in shining armor is really a retard in tin foil
funny huh?
Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that.
'Everyday I think people can't get any stupider. Everyday I'm proven horribly wrong.'
Don't follow in my footsteps...I walk into walls.
"You're not drunk until you have to hold onto the grass to keep from falling off the Earth."
.(\_/)
(='.'=) ...i see a WABBIT.
(")_(")
ok before i go, heres a little something for you all to try out...
say the following to yourselves out loud, nice and slow:
i am we todd it
sofa king we todd it
got the joke yet?
(patronising pat on the head)
you will.
now check out this rainbow:
„øº"~BYE!~"ºø„
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.
REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile):
1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate too)
2. Meet the recruitment bunny!
3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body!
4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me people: MWA HAHAHAHA *cough* *cough!*
5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guy!
6. One word: UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself... Now that's the life
7. Money Money Money : Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys?
8. (Reason I joined) Does there have to be a reason? The dark side is fun! -Flails arms