Just In
This Is Sarcasm PM
My Stories 28
109 The Long, Long Walk » Crow is stuck, but it's not all bad news; he's been offered shelter on the Normandy, and Spider can't hurt them here. Shepard now has an unkillable paracausal warrior, and his 'not-an-AI', Glint, is a complete cinnamon roll, but it's not all good news; he's half-starved, in culture shock, and has a bad case of trust issues. He might need work, sure, but who on this ship doesn't?
Mass Effect & Destiny, T, English, Sci-Fi & Angst, chapters: 18, words: 59k+, favs: 229, follows: 323, updated: 6/29 published: 9/15/2021, Joker, Shepard, Dr. Chakwas, Crow
38Out of Tricks(OVERHAULED EDITION) » Years after the war, Garrus and Tali start 'thinking' about children, and in typical Normandy fashion, they 'accidentally' start a family. As in a kid practically gets thrown at them, and, being suckers, they get attached in less than five minutes. It goes shockingly well at first, but of course the galaxy decides it just doesn't want to stay saved. Typical.
Mass Effect, T, English, Family & Adventure, chapters: 3, words: 14k+, favs: 51, follows: 81, updated: 5/4 published: 9/21/2017, [Garrus V., Tali'Zorah] OC
3The Parting Shot » The Reapers are gone. Shepard is dead. And as Garrus tries to put down an old enemy, and Javik plans to put himself down, fickle fate lands them on the same planet. A 50,000 year old failed mission and an insane mercenary thought to be dead have combined into a deadly powder keg that they'll have to work together to defuse. Somehow.
Mass Effect, T, English, Angst & Suspense, chapters: 2, words: 7k+, favs: 2, follows: 6, updated: 4/6 published: 4/7/2018, Garrus V., Liara T'Soni, Tali'Zorah, Javik
1What If: Your Light Is A Dragon What if... a Guardian's Light was an actual dragon? A series of small accounts of how things might have been if Guardians could turn into great lizards at will. Saladin said it, and I took it as a challenge.
Destiny, T, English, Fantasy & Sci-Fi, words: 3k+, favs: 5, follows: 2, 11/10/2021, Crow, Cayde-6, Lord Saladin, Osiris
What If: The Gifted and Enhanced What if... superpowers, both mundane and extraordinary, were commonplace? An account of what might have happened if Garrus grew up in a Turian Hierarchy obsessed with normality, and the consequences thereof.
Mass Effect, T, English, Sci-Fi & Suspense, words: 3k+, favs: 4, follows: 2, 9/30/2021, Garrus V., Tali'Zorah, Shepard
6 What If: Saladad What if... Lord Saladin found Crow before Spider could even catch a whiff of him? An account of what might have happened if Crow was 'raised' in Felwinter Peak.
Destiny, T, English, Family & Sci-Fi, words: 6k+, favs: 10, follows: 5, 9/22/2021, Crow, Lord Saladin
45 To Trails End » Things go differently-and far more disastrously-for young Crow. Devastated by the truth, he follows a terrible dream through The Howling, and emerges into a reality where there are no Guardians. No Light to stem the tide of Hive threatening to pour in. What's a lone do-gooder to do, aside from the obvious? But the dream gets worse, and worse, until he hears a word; Reapers.
Mass Effect & Destiny, T, English, Sci-Fi & Angst, chapters: 8, words: 20k+, favs: 80, follows: 81, updated: 9/6/2021 published: 8/13/2021, Garrus V., Thane K., Shepard, Crow
16Challenge Accepted » AU. The Garrus and Javik buddy cop fic that nobody asked for. Starring: Garrus, as The Wildcard. Javik, as the Killjoy Partner. Julia Shepard, as The Chief. Feron, as The Incompetent Secretary. Kasumi, as That Guy In The Chair. Their mission? Fight crime, throw pineapples, rinse, repeat. Oh, and cause property damage, of course! But what happens when one of their own is murdered?
Mass Effect, T, English, Humor & Crime, chapters: 5, words: 6k+, favs: 11, follows: 17, updated: 8/19/2021 published: 1/10/2018, Garrus V., Kasumi G., Shepard, Javik
9Post Scorpionis » AU. Five year have passed since the Scorn betrayed Uldren. The Reef is ravaged, and the System is in limbo. The dominoes fall when a Ghost finds her Hunter; one who chooses the name Orion Sol, and bears a dark legacy. Decades-old charades, ancient lies, recent losses, and painful experiences are all about to crash to the surface, and its going to wake up something nasty.
Destiny, T, English, Humor & Western, chapters: 3, words: 7k+, favs: 7, follows: 18, updated: 6/14/2020 published: 8/14/2018, Ghost, Ikora Rey, Uldren Sov, Pahanin
The Black Cape Cafe There's a cafe for bird-lovers on the Citadel. In the hub of the galaxy, there's no telling who might walk-or fly-in through the doors.
Mass Effect, T, English, Humor, words: 410, favs: 1, follows: 1, 4/12/2020
32Losing Time, Taking My Own Way Down » AU. War is a dark thing. Being consumed by a parasitic Vex arm is also grim. So is being ripped from everything you cherish by the Darkness of the Vault. As the Cabal slaughter their way across the system, fates meet, and people put things on the line they didn't know they had. A dark retelling of the Red War, told from the PoV's of Asher Mir and a time-tossed Iron Lord.
Destiny, T, English, Angst & Sci-Fi, chapters: 10, words: 50k+, favs: 26, follows: 37, updated: 10/4/2018 published: 11/20/2017, OC, Lord Shaxx, Lord Saladin, Asher Mir
13 Sever She was on Mercury, talking to Osiris. He was in the new War Room, reading a report. But they both felt it, the severing of the fireteam Link. They both felt their Hunter die.
Destiny, T, English, Tragedy & Angst, words: 1k+, favs: 38, follows: 13, 8/2/2018, Cmdr. Zavala, Cayde-6, Ikora Rey
18Creature Comforts » Even amidst war, tragedy, strife, and personal problems, each member of the Normandy crew, from Shepard, to Tali, and even to Javik and Wrex, have those creature comforts, those tiny things that make each day just a little more bearable; be it a simple cup of coffee, or grind core at ninety decibels while binge watching all the MCU films, here they all are.
Mass Effect, T, English, Humor & Family, chapters: 5, words: 3k+, favs: 15, follows: 17, updated: 8/1/2018 published: 2/10/2018, Garrus V., Tali'Zorah, Thane K., Shepard
4Ragnarok » In 2186, a beam of Dark Matter was injected into the sun Dholen, and Tikkun soon afterwards. Commander Shepard was killed. The massive Reaper turned to other systems, destroying them systematically. The races of the galaxy fled on the delayed vessels of the Andromeda Initiative, turning to the distant galaxy in hope for safe harbor. That hope has been dashed. Welcome to Andromeda.
Mass Effect, T, English, Adventure & Sci-Fi, chapters: 2, words: 5k+, favs: 8, follows: 12, updated: 3/28/2018 published: 3/25/2018, Garrus V., Tali'Zorah, Legion, Hannah S.
1 A Hunter, Osiris, and a Dirt Bike Exactly what is sounds like. Sagira thinks it would be awesome to get her Guardian on a dirt bike, in Simulant Past, with a Hunter, but NOOO; as per usual, he's no fun at all.
Destiny, K+, English, Humor, words: 758, favs: 4, follows: 2, 2/14/2018, Ghost, Osiris, Sagira
2 The Sun Set The protheans are gone. The sun has set on their time in the galaxy. But the last of their kind wakes, 50,000 years later, not to the faces of the Normandy crew, but someone far more menacing. He doesn't care. He only needs revenge, after all; what's the price of becomeing a Shadow compared to the destruction of the Reapers?
Mass Effect & Destiny, T, English, Sci-Fi, words: 1k+, favs: 12, follows: 11, 2/11/2018, Javik, Calus
1 The Stars Wept Jarus did indeed, burn his mind to become a Shadow. But it was not a choice. And he will never forgive-not Calus, not himself, ever.
Destiny, T, English, Angst & Tragedy, words: 1k+, favs: 4, follows: 2, 2/11/2018, Calus
2Necessary Evils Shepard has secured an alliance with the Leviathans, but a certain prothean is none too pleased. Can Garrus survive a visit from the ticked-off avatar? More importantly, can he get Javik to cool down his conniption fit before a planet gets blown up?
Mass Effect, T, English, Humor & Sci-Fi, words: 1k+, favs: 4, follows: 3, 1/30/2018, Garrus V., Shepard, Javik
7A Crew and Their Fluff » Drabble dump containing fluff bits from everyone's favorite crew! Consumer Warning: product contains backsass, bromance, sarcasm, bad ideas, an unforgivable amount of Garrus, what not to do at a furniture store, and more. If you are allergic to any of these, DO NOT READ THIS FIC!
Mass Effect, K+, English, Humor & Family, chapters: 3, words: 3k+, favs: 15, follows: 9, updated: 1/29/2018 published: 12/19/2017, Garrus V., U. Grunt, Shepard, Javik
3What Will You Do After? "Maybe I'll just live." More Normandy crew fluff, takes place during Citadel DLC. Consumer Warning: contains witty humor, alcohol, nicknames, Garrus being a sucker for his friends, Garrus trolling said friends, and a Shepard who hates disorganization. If you are allergic to any of these, DO NOT READ THIS FIC!
Mass Effect, T, English, Humor & Family, words: 1k+, favs: 9, 1/22/2018, Garrus V., Ashley W., Shepard, James V.
28 Page 1 2 Next »
Author: Follow Favorite

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service